The ultimate Too Big to Fail bank really is America, a hypergluttonous ward of the state whose limitless fraud and criminal conspiracies well all be paying for until the end of time.
The ingenious plan to suck multiple fees out of the unemployment checks of jobless workers.
Take your eyes off them for 10 seconds and guaranteed, theyll be into some shit again: This bank is like the worlds worst behaved teenager, taking your car and running over kittens and fire hydrants on the way to Vegas for the weekend, maxing out your credit cards in the three days you spend at your aunts funeral.
Theyre out of control, yet theyll never do time or go out of business, because the government remains creepily committed to their survival, like overindulgent parents who refuse to believe their 40 year old live at home son could possibly be responsible for those dead hookers in the backyard.
Its been four years since the government, in the name of preventing a depression, saved this megabank from ruin by pumping $45 billion of taxpayer money into its arm.
Since then, the Obama administration has looked the other way as the bank committed an astonishing variety of crimes – some elaborate and brilliant in their conception, some so crude that theyd be beneath your average street thug.
Bank of America has systematically ripped off almost everyone with whom it has a significant business relationship, cheating investors, insurers, depositors, homeowners, shareholders, pensioners and taxpayers.
It brought tens of thousands of Americans to foreclosure court using bogus, “robo signed” evidence – a type of mass perjury that it helped pioneer.
It hawked worthless mortgages to dozens of unions and state pension funds, draining them of hundreds of millions in value.
And when it wasnt ripping off workers and pensioners, it was helping to push insurance giants like AMBAC into bankruptcy by fraudulently inducing them to spend hundreds of millions insuring those same worthless mortgages.
But despite being the very definition of an unaccountable corporate villain, Bank of America is now bigger and more dangerous than ever.
It controls more than 12 percent of Americas bank deposits (skirting a federal law designed to prohibit any firm from controlling more than 10 percent), as well as 17 percent of all American home mortgages.
By looking the other way and rewarding the banks bad behavior with a massive government bailout, we actually allowed a huge financial company to not just grow so big that its collapse would imperil the whole economy, but to get away with any and all crimes it might commit.
All the government bailouts succeeded in doing was to make the bank even more prone to catastrophic failure – and now that catastrophe might finally be at hand.
Bank of Americas share price has plunged into the single digits, and the bank faces battles in courtrooms all over America to avoid paying back the hundreds of billions it stole from everyone in sight.
Its credit rating, already downgraded to a few rungs above junk status, could plummet with the next bad analyst report, causing a frenzied rush to the exits by creditors, investors and stockholders – an institutional run on the bank.
Theyre in deep trouble, but they wont die, because our current president, like the last one, apparently believes its better to project a false image of financial soundness than to allow one of our oligarchic banks to collapse under the weight of its own corruption.
Last year, the Federal Reserve allowed Bank of America to move a huge portfolio of dangerous bets into a side of the company that happens to be FDIC insured, putting all of us on the hook for as much as $55 trillion in irresponsible gambles.
Then, in February, the Justice Departments so called foreclosure settlement, which will supposedly provide $26 billion in relief for ripped off homeowners, actually rewarded the bank with a legal waiver that will allow it to escape untold billions in lawsuits.
And this month the Fed will release the results of its annual stress test, in which the bank will once again be permitted to perpetuate its fiction of solvency by grossly overrating the mountains of toxic loans on its books.
At this point, the rescue effort is so sweeping and elaborate that it goes far beyond simply gouging the tax dollars of millions of struggling families, many of whom have already been ripped off by the bank – its making the government, and by extension all of us, full blown accomplices to the fraud.
Anyone who wants to know what the Occupy Wall Street protests are all about need only look at the way Bank of America does business.
They lie, cheat and steal as reflexively as addicts, they laugh at people who are suffering and dont have money, they pay themselves huge salaries with money stolen from old people and taxpayers – and on top of it all, they completely suck at banking.
And yet the state wont let them go out of business, no matter how much they deserve it, and it wont slap them in jail, no matter what crimes they commit.
That makes them not bankers or capitalists, but a class of person that was never supposed to exist in America: royalty.
Self appointed royalty, its true – but just as dumb and inbred as the real thing, and every bit as expensive to support.
Like all royals, they reached their position in society by being relentlessly dedicated to the cause of Bigness, Unaccountability and the Worthlessness of Others.
And just like royals, they spend most of their lives getting deeper in debt, and laughing every year when our taxes go to covering their whist markers.
Bank of America started out in San Francisco in 1904 as an emblem of American capitalism.
Founded by a first generation Italian American named Amadeo Giannini – it was even originally called the Bank of Italy – the bank set out to serve immigrants denied credit by other banks, and it was instrumental in helping to rebuild the city after the devastating earthquake of 1906.
But like many of the truly bad ideas in history, the present day version of Bank of America was the product of a testosterone overdose.
The concept of an overmassive, acquiring everything in sight, bicoastal megabank was hatched in the terminal inferiority complex of a greed sick asshole – actually two greed sick assholes, both of them CEOs of Southern regional banks, who launched a cartoonish arms race of bank acquisitions that would ultimately turn the American business world upside down.
Nicole Hansch is a business journalist based in Sydney, Australia. Nicole has a passion for financial markets and breaking news stories and loves writing about business news, stock market, and economic opinions that matters most to its audience. Nicole spends a lot of time discovering and researching latest financial markets and industry news stories in order to make sure the latest and greatest stories are brought to you first on BigBoardNews.com.

